Have you ever gone on a first date, clicked with someone, and started planning your future together before you even finished dessert? If so, you’re not alone. Many women overinvest in a man before seeing if he’s worth it. Unfortunately, this can lead to heartbreak and disappointment when things don’t work out. However, there are ways to break this cycle and find lasting love.
One of the best ways to avoid overinvesting in one man is to have a busy social life. Women who have lots of passions, hobbies, interests, and friends rarely overinvest because they don’t have time for it. On the other hand, women who sit at home every Friday and Saturday night, hoping that their crush will call, tend to be the needy ones.
When you live a thrilling life, you’re too busy to get hung up on one guy. No man will want a life with you unless you have an amazing life without him, and vice versa. When you date with an abundance mindset, you’ll be less likely to overinvest in one man. You’ll recognize that there are plenty of amazing single men out there, and you have many options.
Another way to avoid overinvesting is to move slower than he wants. Pace the progression of your connections and be in the driver’s seat. If you move too fast, pause, breathe, and slow things down even more. This will make men pursue you harder. It’s not about playing games; you don’t play hard to get. You’re hard to get because you now have options. This step gives you the time to decide which man is worth exclusivity.
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It’s also important not to allow yourself to like a man just because he doesn’t like you. Our primal brain naturally raises a person’s value when they are pulling away. We subconsciously think, “if he’s not into me, then he must be a SUPER high value guy.” The big shift we make with our clients is that if a guy isn’t a hell yes, then it’s a no. If he’s not pursuing you, he doesn’t deserve you.
Lastly, until you have the “DTR” (define the relationship), continue to date multiple guys. Until you have explicitly said you are exclusive, assume you are not. You are free to see other people, and you should be doing so! When you date with a strategy, you are in the power seat, qualifying the man to see if he meets your love vision. If it’s easy, he’s probably not the one.
In conclusion, overinvesting in one man can be tempting, but there are better approaches to finding lasting love. By having a busy social life, dating with an abundance mindset, pacing the progression of your connections, recognizing your worth, and dating multiple guys until you’re exclusive, you’ll increase your chances of finding Mr. Right. Remember, never give a man unearned affection, and don’t put him on a pedestal. You are the prize, and the right man will pursue you.