Have you ever wondered how to know if a guy is falling in love with you?
The biggest sign is if he tells you he loves you, but what if he’s holding out on those three words as I did?
I waited five months before I first said “I love you” to Jessica. It wasn’t because I didn’t love her sooner; it was because I said it way too fast in my previous relationship, only to break up with that woman a week later (sorry!). So I wanted to wait and make sure my feelings were real this time.
The moral of my story?
He might love you but not have told you yet. So, here are four signs that he is falling hard.
- He stops checking you out and starts gazing into your eyes
The Journal of Psychological Science did a study on this. They asked men to look at photos of women they were sexually attracted to and photos of women they loved. They found men only looked at the body of the women they were sexually attracted to. But they would gaze into the eyes of the women they loved.
In the early stages of dating, men tend to look at women more sexually. But as time passes and his feelings deepen, he will start looking at her in a much deeper, soulful way. Most women can feel the difference between a man checking her out and a man gazing into her soul.
- You’re always laughing together
Especially at dumb jokes that aren’t even funny!
Research published in the Evolutionary Psychology Journal found that laughing at each other’s jokes was a sign of dating interest.
Even more interesting is that men care less about women being funny than women laughing at their jokes. When a woman laughs at a man’s jokes, he feels closer to her, which helps build an emotional connection.
What can I say? We need validation, ladies!
- He has stopped caring about other women
The Journal of Comparative Neurology took MRI scans of men falling in love. They found that when a man is in love, a certain part of his brain lights up that doesn’t if he’s only experiencing a sexual attraction.
When a man is in love, his brain is programmed to focus on that one woman, and he won’t want to be with anyone else. If you’re at this stage, too, that’s awesome! It’s what I call Little Love Step #5 of my 7 Little Love Steps. It’s natural to want to jump into an exclusive relationship and speed things up here, but I recommend slowing things down (pacing) so that you don’t go too fast too soon.
- He will try new things with you
Studies show that your sense of self changes when you’re just starting to fall in love with someone. You become more open to trying new things and less stubborn and stuck in your ways. This willingness to change is a sign of falling in love.
That doesn’t mean you fundamentally change who you are at your core—don’t do that—but it’s natural in a relationship as you spend more time together to mesh into each other.
So if a man is up for trying new things with you that he wouldn’t usually do, this is a great sign he’s falling in love with you.
A sign he’s not falling in love with you: he’s all audio, no video
Certain guys out there won’t hold back on dropping the l-bomb. Usually, these guys could talk for America. But I want you to watch out for guys who tell you they love you but don’t back those words up with actions.
A guy like this is all audio, no video. Audio is important, but the video is more important. Actions speak louder than words.
So if you have yet to see any evidence that a man does love you like he claims to, don’t over-invest your time and energy in him. Wait until you see him invest in you.